Start with D'arcy in a nightclub being the DJ. D'arcy: Here's my funky techno beat! The music starts, D'arcy dances very badly (either that, or does the Dirty Bird)

*It's you that I adore, you will always be my whore...you'll be a mother to my child and a child to my heart...*

Cut to the dance floor, Billy, James, and Jimmy in drag doing a choreographed number straight out of Backstreet Boys. Billy is wearing a bustier and a miniskirt, and a long wig. James and Jimmy are wearing extravagant floor-length dresses.

*We must never be apart...We must never be apart...*

D'arcy slumped over the turntables laughing, hits the "Call Security: Wierdo Alert" button on her console.

*Lovely girl, you're the murder in my world, without you there aren't reasons left to find*

Bouncers (Big huge bodybuilders in thongs and cop hats) stomp up to the boys, they act shocked in that girly way, putting their hands up to their mouths and gasping, etc.

*And I'll pull your crooked teeth, you'll be perfect just like me, you'll be a lover in my bed and a gun to my head...*

Billy stomps his/her high-heeled foot and argues with the bouncers. They seem charmed by the band's antics.

*We must never be apart...we must never be apart...*

Cut to D'arcy's jaw dropping in amazement, then back to the floor. Billy has grabbed one of the bouncers' noses and is shaking his head with it like a handle, sneering and laughing at him.

*Lovely girl, you're the murder in my world, dressing coffins for the souls I've left to die...*

Jimmy and James pull guns from their bras. They reach in, the camera cuts to their faces, and then back to the two of them holding machine guns. The bouncers run.

*Drinking mercury to the mystery of all that you should leave behind in time*

Cut to D'arcy with her hands up, screaming.

*In you I see dirty, in you I count stars, in you I feel so pretty, in you I taste god...*

Cut back to James and Jimmy pointing bazookas at D'arcy, Billy in front of them filing his nails. Billy waves D'arcy down to the floor. The extras, who were dancing until James and Jimmy whipped out their pieces, are covering themselves in plastic bags a la Gallagher.

*In you I feel so hungry, in you I crash cars...we must never be apart*

D'arcy steps down from the turntables and puts up her "Out to Lunch" sign. She walks down to the floor.

*Drinking mercury for the mystery of all that you should leave behind, lovely girl, you're the murder in my world, dressing coffins for the souls I've left behind in time...we must never be apart*

Cut to all four band members. Instead of bazookas, James and Jimmy are now sitting on huge cannons in a very unladylike way (but they have long skirts). Billy waves out the window and a car crashes through the door. James and Jimmy jump off their cannons and run to meet the car. D'arcy spins both cannons around and points them at James and Jimmy.

*(Solo!) D'arcy lights the cannons and blows up James and Jimmy. Billy gives her a heaping plate of sassy (Snapping fingers, leaning in her face, "Brick Wall", etc.)!

*You'll always be my whore, 'cause you're the one that I adore, I'll pull your crooked teeth, you'll be perfect just like me...in you I feel so dirty, in you I crash cars...in you I feel so pretty, in you I taste god...*

D'arcy and Billy have a slap fight. The getaway car backs out.

*We must never be apart....*

Cut to the outside of the club, Billy flying out the window like he got kicked, the getaway car waiting. Billy bounces off the hood of the car and his wig falls off. He gets in the car and it speeds off.

Inside the car, Billy and the driver are bent over laughing.

*(song fading out)*

Inside the club, D'arcy takes down her "Out to Lunch" sign and keeps mixing beats. A couple of the dancers are playing with James and Jimmy's bodies, making them dance like puppets. Fade to black as if nothing ever happened.

By - Jennifer ZERO314735@aol.com